Lessons in pandemic Powder
Lesson 1: The Local “Mountain” Rules Supreme
Sure the elevation is next to nothing and there’s a 50/50 chance you just skied over a rock. Yes, you have to pack special gloves so the tow rope doesn’t eat away your half-a-paycheck down mittens. But there’s nothing like a pandemic to make you appreciate what you have right in front of you. And what you have is a tried-and-true, probably dusty, definitely quirky local mountain (fine, hill) with a dedicated group of die-hards who never want to ski anywhere else. She isn’t dramatic or mysterious, but damn is she reliable and she’ll make you a better skier. Make sure to send it over the jump the middle schoolers built in the center of the only run.
Lesson 2: There is no lunacy in layers
In a normal year, we rely on modern heating technology to keep us warm and it’s made us soft. The solution to the spread of “soft”: more layers. From highly technical merino wool and down jackets to thrift store sweaters with moth holes, the perfect layer exists for everyone. And chances are good that your warmest layers don’t really match. So you’ll be walking around stiff, puffy, and colorful, but dammit you’ll be warm! And yes, it will take you twenty minutes if you have to go to the bathroom. But, come on, it’s kind of spicy to be unsure of exactly how many layers of clothing you’re wearing, isn’t it?
Lesson 3: Weather is Unpredictable, but not as unpredictable as a pandemic
It seems a rare form of foolishness to rely on something as unpredictable as the weather system to decide your opportunities for maximum winter enjoyment. But year after year we read the Farmer’s Almanac and dutifully check the weekly forecasts to try to determine when we can finally go skiing. Will it rain? Will it snow? Will it snow enough? We just don’t know! The sky laughs at our questions.
In a normal year, the weather is the most unpredictable part of the ski season (if you don’t count the off-color, retired ski bum who may or may not offer you a joint on the chairlift and invite you on a nudist hike). But after the year we just had, the unpredictability of the weather is almost comforting. At least we know what we don’t know.
Lesson 4: Aprés-Everything
Putting Aprés before anything makes it feel fancy. Call a shower your Aprés-workout and it feels like you’re going to a spa. Aprés-workweek (aka the weekend) feels full of possibility and Aprés-sunrise is a nice way of saying your alarm clock is probably about to go off.
The beloved, time-honored tradition of Aprés-ski has required modifications this year, it’s true. But it’s spirit cannot be dampened! Taking away the full bar and the flush toilets can’t diminish the allure of the après. An Aprés-ski around the tailgate of your buddy’s car makes you feel like a dirtbag, even though you just spent way too much money on a lift ticket. Sure, you have to navigate the slushy parking lot in ski boots and try to open your beer wearing mittens, but you still get to celebrate a great day on the slopes with your pals and a partially frozen beer. Cheers to that and cheers to pandemic powder!
